Pro-Life, Anti-Capitalist

Occasionally someone will drop a turd into the toilet I call the comments section that is so amazing, so pungent, so..so Condileeeeeezza Ricey, that I feel compelled to fish it out with my coathanger-and-stocking net and pick the fiberous mass apart with a pair of cheap take-out chopsticks:

"I'm pro-life and I honesty don't think you should be able to have a child."

Heh. Better take it up with your God and the pharmacist who, for religious reasons, refused to dispense contraceptives to me.

"You are greedy and selfish. To use your body to earn money and prove a point is nothing worth living for, why are you alive? Honestly, doesn't anything in this world make you happy?"

You know that retarded store greeter at your local Wal-Mart? Don't tell anyone, but he actually gets paid to greet you. If Wal-Mart didn't pay him 6 dollars an hour he probably wouldn't bother greeting you. And here's a shocker for ya: That retard uses his body to greet you. Those chubby, uncoordinated arms he raises to you every time you come in to buy expired bologna and Wonderbread aren't astral projections. And he might also be making some sort of commie/pinko point about the integration of the mentally challenged into the general community. Yes, I agree, it's disgusting. Next time this retard greets you, tell him what he's doing is nothing worth living for. Demand to know why he's alive. Ask the demented shovel-faced feeb if anything in the world makes him happy. Then call on Wal-mart to stop paying this guy. That'll learn him, the fucking whore!

"There is no hope for you or your child and I hope people realize this, too bad your mom fucked your dad because the conclusion was you, but more than likely you screwed your dad too."

Wait, there's no hope for my "child", you hope the rest of the world realizes this, you suspect the kid's the result of incest and yet you want the kid to be born? Why? Do you want to use its living, deformed, retarded, hopeless body to make a point or something? You want my kid to be a whore? What are you? A pimp?

"Honestly, get a fucking life and a real job. Work for your money, you might actually find happiness."

Umm, since I seem to mention my job as a bartender in every other post, and I list my occupation as "bartender" in my profile, you must think "bartender" is a voluntary, unpaid position whose reward is the warm glow received from watching fat, drunk rednecks piss all over themselves. And since I'm not getting paid for this, aren't I doing what you want me to do?

Bartenders: we're not like those overpaid, self-prostituting, retarded Wal-Mart greeters!