Pregnant Drinking Game
This will be my first night of unemployment since Mom's last boyfriend kicked me out of the trailer 3 years ago. A fake ID and a mature attitude to booze have allowed me to work as a bartender. Thank you, fetus, for ruining my brilliant career.
I wasn't really sure what to do with myself tonight, but since I had to go to the liquor store anyway to cash my last paycheck, I decided to buy a couple of bottles of tequila and invent a new drinking game:
FETUS DRINKING GAME
1. If the fetus kicks, take a drink.
2. If the fetus doesn't kick, drink until it does.
3. If someone emails me or leaves a comment here to call me a "slut", "whore" or "twisted bitch", take a drink and a bong hit.
4. If nobody emails me, take a drink and an even longer bong hit to deal with the lack of attention.
5. If someone donates to my Paypal account, feel more confident about being able to afford more tequila and chronic when the supply runs out; take two drinks, masturbate with bong after taking a hit from it.
posted by stopmyabortion @ 10:03 AM
13 comments
13 Comments:
by god you are fucking hilarious and I mean that without sarcasm.
so are you still editing your comments?
Ha funny how you get all butthurt if someone calls you a slut or whore or blah blah blah but you have no problem knockin the pro-lifers, you are just as bad as they are, maybe you shouldn't dish it out if you can't take it sweetie.
you rule.
I love this.
" for ruining my brilliant career."
Prostitution?
LOL!
BTW, Anon#2, SMA seems to know how to "dish it out" in more ways than one!
LOL!
I don't know....ummm....a disgusting slut is not my idea of a "dish", though!
LOLOL!
You know--there must be good reason that this person has to rely on any swinging-dick to get satisfaction! Probably because no decent, moral person would touch it with a ten-foot pole!
LOL!
Thanks, everyone, for stopping by my place!
The blog owner is a liar, folks!
if this wasnt a political joke, you wouldn't even be able to take flicks of the aborted fetus, I doubt they'd even let you see it since it wouldnt belong to you anymore. If you were really pregnant and having an abortion, i guarentee you wouldnt be paying for it, the state would be so it would belong to them and they would prob donate it to research.
Neways, you shouldnt try to scam ppl outta thier skrill, but if they are dumb enough to believe that this blog is legit then maybe they deserve it.
I love you! I hope the pro-lifers send you lots and lots of money.. But you know they won't because they are all welfare sucking scumbags or, as we all know, they really don't fucking care.. Fuck them!! Human life is not the precious gift most tend to think it is.. Think Charles Manson, Jeffrey Dahmer, Susan Smith, Ted Bundy, John Wayne Gacy.. They were all cuuute wittle behbies too ya know..
See, I was just about to give you $40,000, but you just ruined the fetus and it's going to be crippled at birth. Since we pro-lifers don't give a fuck about the baby once it's born anyway, there's no point in giving you money.
Kill the bastard. He is a bastard, ain't he?
Dude you need to do stand-up (if you don't already). Your writing is fucking metal.
to reply to the anonymous poster a few lines before this one:
since when in the history of anything, ever has the federal government alloted funds of any kind to go towards abortions?
the answer: never.
ever.
idiot.
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